Sunday Papers early edition Passover Papyrus Preview - Jordi kills the dragon (again)

international | arts and media | opinion/analysis

Friday April 22, 2005 18:18

by ipsiphi

the 23rd day of the 4th month is marked by many countries as their day of mythical connection.

This years St Jordi day by which the Catalan people mark their national saint by exchanging gifts of books and roses, is notable for two reasons-

It coincides with the first international year of the Book

It coincides for the first time in many centuries with the Jewish holiday of Passover and the first Pesach of the state of Israel.

this is a black sheep painted on the walls by ONG collective BCN. we are all little black lambs. Our angels are awesome. We're going home.

St jordi is the catalan name given to St George, he is the patron saint of Catalonia, England, Portugal and the foremr soviet republic of Georgia to name a few.

Passover is the english name for "pesach" the day that the jewish people mark the beginning of the exodus which brought them out of slavery in Egypt and to the acceptance of the law of Moses and eventually to the land of milk and honey where they stayed for quite a while.

in Catalonia, St Jordi day is marked by the exchange of gifts.
Boys give girls roses.
And Girls give boys books.
& Hey in a modern tippy toppy civilisation if boys want to give boys roses or books then grrrls will only be happy to exchange roses and books as well.

There is room for us all @ the inn.

Catalonia bears the cross of Jordi, since the crusades and period of the Templers, a much maligned bunch by historical record who well versed in much mumbo jumbo (we remember this was afore the hocus pocus of haec pisces) got a reputation for being a dodgy bunch of witches through their 23 grand masters, the last Guifré really got a roasting by the press and the church of Rome for being errant on liberalism.

Anyway, Portugal, also is one of the lands of Jordi, but in Portuguese Jordi is pronounced diferently and people mark the meaning of Jordi with less enthuasiasm and perhaps less connection to the far and mysterious past.

In England, people don't really do anything at all, there the popular sentiment gets torched on November 5. But Jordi does his trick. With Eulalia everytime. Eulalia is the patroness of Catalonia and she carries as is very significant the X cross which is also known to some as the Paddy's cross and to very few others as the cross of the Tuatha de Danaan. You will see both crosses on the seal of trinity college dublin.

So If Jordi ever existed, what did he do to be remember so much in such strange places?

well every kid knows the tale.

A Dragon, a bad kind of dragon, molested a village and extracted the most cruel tribute from the villagers who in their great fear began to sacrifice their daughters to it.

The dragon we remember is one of the symbols of the city of Barcelona and as well Hong Kong which like Lisbon, and indeed Rome is built on seven hills. As anyone who remembers the Welsh or Cantonese story knows beneath all hills of seven sleep dragons. Please note however the symbol of Rome is a wolf suckling two human children.

Dragons come in many varieties -the good variety, used by the architect Gaudí of Catalonia, referred to in the final psalms of David's harp music, (long after the jewish people escaped the slavery of egypt) and the bad bad nasty variety which does not "sing praise" to the garden but alone extracts tribute.

I told you all about it last year on St Jordi's day.

Most children know the story of how Moses brought his people out of Egypt as well, but just in case you'd like to hear it again, here it is:-

.:. + * € $ @ %

The jewish people worked as slaves for the egyptians who had them doing all the heavy lifting, tending to the gardens, cooking food, fanning them with big ostrich feathers, and filling their baths with milk, some of the prettier ones were called on to pretend they really sighed and had a good time. They didn't get paid much, in fact they got paid nothing, but the Egyptians thought this was "ok", because their civilisation (like that of Rome and Greece long after), could only survive with slave labour. They used to mutter to each other a lot, "who do these "hebrews" think they are?" (jews were called hebrews then). "don't we give them nice camps to live in, and look at them having babies all the time and using up our resources" "there's no such thing as fortress egypt" " i do like their food".

Well along came Moses, he was a schizophrenic and quite probably autistic in the "joseph" (another hebrew) model, but his coat wasn't as eye catching. Now he had made one of the daughters of Pharoah (an official term for the chief executive officer of Egypt) sigh...
and sigh and sigh, sincerely.
& because of that, he could speak egyptian really really well.

He went to see the CEO and said:-

"I want proper papers for my people to leave slavery and go to the promised land".

Well the CEO was having none of it, he said, but who will fan us with ostrich leaves? who will do the heavy lifting? who will rake in the crops? and who will fill our baths and make us feel like super-lover-nietschean-gogo guys?

And this is what Moses said (coz he was getting a bit carried away)

"If you don't let my people go, our God, who Joseph told your ancestor about, will strike ye down, all smoting (for he verily smotes) with plagues and pestilence and tribulations".

At which the CEO laughed. "let's see what happens".

Well the following year, the rivers got all contaminated, and the crops failed, and everyone got really spotty, no matter how much they bathed in milk, and the climate changed a tiny bit and loads of insects came and ate any of the crops that had survived.- At which point, the CEO called for Moses to come along and talk to him again.

"well Moses, it seems we have had a bit of bad luck, and we can after all afford to rationalise sections of our human resources so I'll order my scribes up in Thebes today to put into operation a process of complete regularisation for your people so that they can go to the promised land".

But then he changed his mind. Coz he was a bad muthafuka (and sistahfuka too).

Well Moses was very angry, and let it be known (by postering walls and distributing mini-papyri in the market places) that God was going to smote again. & this time it would be serious.

& yeah verily it came to pass and was woeful.

For God sent one of his really nasty angels to kill the oldest child in every house in the lands of Egypt (which was bigger than the egypt in your atlas today). Coz God sort of liked Moses. But the angel was under strict instructions (they normally are) not to go into any houses with lamb's blood on the lintel (the bit over the door).

And then the following morning while all the egyptians and their other migrant workers who hadn't entrusted their collective political representation to a man with an angelic network like Moses were gnashing their teeth and wailing, the hebrews pissed off.

They didn't even have time to finish baking their bread. so it turned out like pitta but only flatter.

Now "pissed off" is a bit of an exageration, for as slaves they didn't have access to four wheel chariots, and had to carry their old folk and disabled and babies in their arms and made very slow progress.

Meanwhile, the old CEO finished his year long mourning ritual and gnashing of teeth, and decided to give chase, so that he might do some smoting of his own.

At which point the special effects department introduced another nasty angel who put up a firewall like you saw in the remake of planet of the apes between the very fast moving egyptians in their 4 wheel chariots and the very slow moving hebrews.

Eventually moses parted the Red sea for them as well, by which stage he was mythic. It took them about 40 years (with delays for cancellations, and security alerts) to get to the land of milk and honey.
And along the way, Moses saw God up a mountain. He was very special, most people didn't get to see God. He got given 10 rules which were really useful, and told his people not to worship the bull market or stuff like that and he got instructions on how to build a nuclear reactor like you saw in the movie indiana jones.

As soon as he was dead, his people decided to make 613 rules out of the 10, so that in this weeks preparations for passover, some ultra-orthodox jews won't use tap water coz it aint kosher, and having a "kosher" label on your product increases sales by almost 12.5%!
A leading rabbi has confirmed that Viagra is "kosher" since the people who make viagra, have changed the coating on the pill so it has no potential for "rising" in the dough sense, but will still mean a rise, and hopefully a sigh.

¿where does joseph ratzinger come into all this I hear you fans of the sunday papers ask?

well, as luck would have it, the first pope to be elected by a landslide in what we call the XXI century, is also a fluent speaker of latin, and committed to peace, has a great big heart, and is lovely under all the mud raking, and will get crowned pontiff of Rome on Sunday banned folk music in RC churches last year on this day and has an email account and is getting a copy of this passover papyrus preview edition.
.:. his first test is his last test .:.

coz he's traditional.

It is great to be literate.
It is great to leave Egypt.
It is great to be numerate.
It is great to have roses.

this is copyright coz I sold it already but i made wee changes to it so you could enjoy your kosher copyleft version ©

I heartily recommend "the curious incident of the dog in the night-time" a novel by Mark haddon, which i was given the other day, and have thoroughly enjoyed reading. = moltes gracies L.

& I recommend not burning books or papyrus. and @ this back issue of "the Sunday Papers" you'll find links to some sites where you can read books for free.
http://www.indymedia.ie/newswire.php?story_id=64031

and never you forget-

Ná díol caora dhubh, ná ceannaigh caora dhubh, agus ná bí gan caora dhubh.

Neither buy or sell a black sheep but never be without one.

(it looks really cool in latin you know)

save preference

Comments (6 of 6)

morally and ethically "growing up"

by -

Fri Apr 22, 2005 22:49

is the theme in the big world of non-latin speakers.
As you would expect Israelis have a look at themselves leading up to passover and traditional sedar night celebrations, and accordingly there are reflections in today's Haaretz editorial on -
the poverty besetting the weakest in society-
http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/pages/ShArt.jhtml?itemNo=568217
the interview goes to Ephraim Helavi, who was director of the Mossad and ponders "pax americana" (that's a bit of latin)
http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/pages/ShArt.jhtml?itemNo=568076
there opinion writers wonder should Zionism grow up?
http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/pages/ShArt.jhtml?itemNo=568215

And in the long look at how 10 really good rules got turned into by the time of Christ, (AD) 6 approx several thousand years later (where ratzinger comes in) into over 613, and now in kosher viagra time the rules are so messed up -
that the really really orthodox people who started the whole religion thing off, hang their lettuce out to dry and mine their salt near Sodom but can't tell you if its ok to put someone on a life support machine or when to take them off.
http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/spages/567620.html

Which brings me to the first decision by the government of Spain the 400+ year ally and guarantor (along with the French) of the Vatican State and good old new Joe the holy lamb of Rome. They have decided to authorise civil marriage union contracts between partners of the same sex. I assure there is no legalising "sodomy" clause, and perhaps the lambs of the seven hills should pay more attention to those who read leviticus in the original and know that such things happen to the poorest and weakest of society, and often it has nothing to do with sex, it just means getting fucked.

And whilst we leave the between egypt and sodom allusion let us remember Berlusconi thus will (say it) announce his new government tomorrow just in time for the newly enthroned pontiff who is the only elected politician in the world to speak latin by the way, and get depicted in cartoons as goosestepping, to bless it on monday morning.

oh well as pharoah would say-
let's see what happens.
and as the little monk said in ancient irish before Rome had even a look in -
baaaaaa baaaaaaa lovely black sheep.
you're staying in the flock.

Today is the death day of Cervantes and Shakespeare.

by iosaf

Sat Apr 23, 2005 13:06

both writers died on st Jordi's day.
which today is world literature day.
which is also passover.

the industry of books is a curious one, and the business of literacy is also curious. One can be literate with sign language, one can be literate with algebra yet avoid numeracy, one can be musically literate, one can decypher the heiroglyphs of egypt and yet not be able to make a list of demands understood, one can nail theses to a door but not everyone will be able to read them, with this in mind we have dvd versions and audio recordings for modern people, and a vatican which is using latin as it's lingua franca.

I've just gone to visit the local government on its open day, it was mostly built during the days when shakespeare and cervantes lived, and was built between a roman temple a templars castle and a jewish synagogue.
It rings its bells very happily every jordi's day as over a million catalans go to the streets and exchange their roses, one strand of wheat, little flag ribbon, and books and say-

We are literate.
We love each other.

& its quite something, their business of literacy is worth over 30 billion euros. And there are books on the stalls set up this morning along the streets for everyone's taste and reading ability. However there are not many latin titles on the street, one of these can be got from the antiquarian bookshops which are a little more "expensive". The music store "casa beethoven" even sells cheapo manuscripts to people who are musically literate.
What a wonderful gift. It is worth pondering that of the fire which was often breathed by the dragon, were reams and reams of books burnt.
Yes, for the dragon not only burnt maidens, the dragon burnt books and all types of people.
Indeed some of us believe it was the dragon who burnt that cheese onto the toast long ago.

for .:. the cheese does not move
it is stuck to the toast .:.

So we find in these days of scientific enlightenment reflections on the genetic inheritence of man, is he merely a monkey?
Is he merely a monkey capable of producing a shakespeare, now as we know all images of shakespeare are fake?
Is the human, so capable of intellectual endevour, and reason, and will, yet confined by the "nature" of genetic code?
Was it code that put shakespeare together?
Was it code that brought us Cervantes?
Is it code that puts one person in love with another?
Is it natural to be celibate?
I can not answer questions of nature, unless they are put to me in ways which are intelligent, yet human. But I do know, if a lot of papyrus, and books had not been burnt through the ages, through all the St Jordi's days, and all the morality tales of Shakespeare and Cervantes, we would have more wheat, more love and more compassion.

the image of shakespeare we like-
http://www.indymedia.ie/newswire.php?story_id=69519
this years Cervantes "Don Quixote" anniversary, a beautiful site which is worth visiting if only to enjoy the portal open-
http://www.donquijotedelamancha2005.com/main.php

the 8th sonnet.
Music to hear, why hear'st thou music sadly?
Sweets with sweets war not, joy delights in joy.
Why lovest thou that which thou receivest not gladly,
Or else receivest with pleasure thine annoy?
If the true concord of well-tuned sounds,
By unions married, do offend thine ear,
They do but sweetly chide thee, who confounds
In singleness the parts that thou shouldst bear.
Mark how one string, sweet husband to another,
Strikes each in each by mutual ordering,
Resembling sire and child and happy mother
Who all in one, one pleasing note do sing:
Whose speechless song, being many, seeming one,
Sings this to thee: 'thou single wilt prove none.'

puzzling isn't it? don't worry - we're still going home. he failed the test

MIT threw their pianos out this week. What a mournful sound.

is it natural to be celibate?

by augustine

Sat Apr 23, 2005 13:15

xt+l =lxt(1 -xt) or Nnew = kNold (1 - Nold).

by soft maths

Sat Apr 23, 2005 16:52

N stands for population density.
N new is the population in a year
N old is the population the year before.
K is the constant.

as in maths constant not constantine.

This is one of the little gems of maths that pepper "the curious incident of the dog in the night-time" by Mark Haddon, a novel about a boy with aperger's syndrome.

He gives, as an example for the reader, a clear and understandable description of the behavior arising from a logistic equation that expresses the population of a system of animals as Nnew = kNold (1 - Nold). Varying the parameter k can give several different outcomes, including extinction, stable growth to a limiting population, cyclical oscillation of population sizes, and even chaotic variation. This example, originating in work of May, Oster, and Yorke, was one of the early manifestations of chaos theory.

Now using the work of May Oster and Yorke we can see that the latin speaking state of the Vatican is using some un-natural means of population control. The population has remained static since records were published to friendly outside states in the early 1920s at around 1000. We can conclude therefore that if the rest of humanity experiences a constant part of the equation over 3.65 and enters chaotic variation, and becomes extinct :-

"And it means that sometimes a whole population of frogs, or worms, or people, can die for no reason whatsoever, just because that is the way the numbers work."

The Vatican state will continue to have a stable population of latinspeakers with which to repopulate the world-
So the species will survive.
Thank God for that.

There being only one little problem, there are very few women in the Vatican state, on account of their souls not being as good, and their potential to distract from the celibacy. Those that meet the stringent linguistic requirements, however will have to be called upon to be the future mothers of humanity. At which point we would discover, (if we were still around, but we will have been smote by then) what percentage of the Vatican population carry the genes for

- Aspergher's syndrome, left-handedness, obesity, big bones, looking good in a skirt, multiple scleroris, dodgy spelling, linguistic ability, dark hair, snub noses, aarskog syndrome, aberfeld syndrome, baller-gerold syndrome, behr syndrome (both 1&2), bening familial megalencapholy, being lazy, being a night worker, kabuki snydrome, kaufmann syndrome (all 3 of them), being more susceptible to HIV, kifafa seizure disorder, obesity-mental retardation-delayed puberty-macroorchidism-acanthosis nigricans-hyperinsulinemia syndrome, Wieacker-Wolff syndrome and of course being gay.

HH Benedict XVI

by :-) iosaf - {this comment ends this very special edition of the Sunday Papers}

Sun Apr 24, 2005 15:10

began his pontificacy this morning with an interesting homily which though not outlining his plans for the future, reached out to everyone -believer and non-believer, roman and non roman catholic, christian- catholic or protestant, evangelical or agent smith and acknowledged the jewish fraternity and sorority and their spiritual heritage and brought us through the symbolism of baaabaaaas and fishies.

He's a very very intelligent man who understands his job and very special role.

We have thanks to the wonder of our scientific investigation, and the genius of many men and women entered an age of great knowledge as to the nature of humanity. But one which is fraught by ethical and other consequences. These will become more and more apparent, & so we must never consider it too late, to suggest that some knowledge is not to be understood by us.

The marriage of scientific and capitalist speculation is nurturing a brave world which the doctors of the capitalist and eugenic anti-religion of solely material based society, Ford and Edison would have been well pleased with, but one in which all children of man might not long hope to be cherished equally, as is the message of the born, living, resurrected and transfigured Christ.

baaaaaaaaaaaaaaa baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
woooooooooooooof woooooooooooooooof

God, theology and philosophy might indeed be served at this time by a Rotweiller who understands what relativism means more than he ever really needed Bono who just sells CDs.

do your job Benedict!
we don't have to agree with everything you say
For we don't have to buy Bono's CDs.

which one do you really want to eat? your choice. always was.

Curious little piece of diplomacy from Papa Ratzi.

by iosaf .:. ipsiphi ·.·

Fri Jul 29, 2005 17:03

Pope Ratzinger and Israel concerning his condemnation of terrorism last sunday.

This is what he said:-

"These days of peace and rest have also been disturbed by the tragic news of the execrable terrorist attacks, which have caused death, destruction and suffering in several countries, such as Egypt, Turkey, Iraq and Great Britain. While entrusting to divine goodness the deceased, the wounded and their loved ones, victims of such gestures that offend God and man, we invoke the Almighty to stop the murderous hand of those who, moved by fanaticism and hatred, have committed them and to convert their hearts to thoughts of reconciliation and peace."

And Israel was aghast, why didn't he mention Israel and Palestine, for the day after LONDON 7/7 there was a suicide bombing in Netanya.

Then the Vatican said this :-
“The Holy See’s explanation was that the pope left out Netanya because he was only referring to the latest incidents.”
http://www.jewlicious.com/?p=1276#comments

& now the Vatican have said that they many not condemn all terrorism in the Israel Palestine situation because Israel acts illegally all too often :-
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/4726833.stm

This is very interesting, Read the complete Sunday Papers above, about Egypt and stuff, reflect on the rôle that the Pope plays as the nearest we get to an "ayatollah" in the west.
Compare contrast with the "fatwa" phenomona, understand that many israelis and jews now understand the "pulsa denura" passed on Sharon as proof if any were needed of the nutty tradition of apocalyptic religion meets politics thing.
http://www.indymedia.ie/newswire.php?story_id=71218

Please note the selective use of "divine intervention", remember the bombings of July 21, remember how the Irish commercial press said it was a miracle the irish bar survived in Sheik El Charm, but said nothing of the death of the teenage tourist in Turkey. Please note the conspiracy games of numerology as applied to almost every "terror attack" but not applied to the IRA statement.

Connect the summit "extraordinary summit" convened yesterday by Egypt with all muslim states in Sheik el Charm for the 3rd of August with these issues.

c/f egypt and the innocents & comments
http://www.indymedia.ie/newswire.php?story_id=71105

Connect the underlying causes of Africa.

note that the newest suspect to be arrested for the London bombings who first was declared as a Pakistani, has been arrested today in Zambia.
Connect the story of african orphans who went to lve in england and thought to bomb London when Mr Blair was making poverty history.
C/f july 11 comment at 5.55pm
http://www.indymedia.ie/newswire.php?story_id=70699#comment116265

Then reflect a while how I have told ye all this before.

In fact connect it all.

Spend the month of august reading my articles. Touch the screen, hassle the editors for my contact details, send me money.
& I'll send you a little bracelet to keep you safe and guarantee your prosperity and luck with girls or boys of proper age. Because I've now realised a Nobel prize and eventual immortality and a constellation named afer me is not enough.

I want loads of dosh too & summer holidays & a decent dentist.

@.:.+$€%/*
i mac diarmada
©

Number of comments per page

Upcoming Events

New Events

Other Press

User Preferences

Feeds

Blog Feeds

Anti-Empire

Human Rights in Ireland

Lockdown Skeptics

Voltaire Network

Sunday Papers early edition Passover Papyrus Preview - Jordi kills the dragon (again)

Comments (6 of 6)