Fox News claims man shown on TV really is George Bush

national | miscellaneous | news report Tuesday April 22, 2003 21:01 by Eoin Meany xoin at hotmail dot com

Defiant Bush drawing crowds - on TV

A man said to be George Bush has appeared on the US station, Fox News. The man appeared to be crossing a lawn followed by a small dog, with a building that looked like the White House in the background.

The station claimed that the film was shot last Thursday, although there were no signs in the short clip to verify this assertion. However, if this is the case it would appear to show that there are still areas of the US that are safe from dirty bombs, anthrax and terrorist chemical attacks, a claim vociferously denied by the White House.
French officials said they were examining the tape for authenticity. Experts have been called in to determine if the man in the film really is George W. Bush or a damn good body double.
‘We are looking at the tape very carefully’, said Jacques Escargot, an official of the Baby Bush Verification Unit of the French Secret Service. ‘It may take some weeks to determine if the tape really is of Bush, and if so when and where it was filmed. This could be Mr. Bush or it could just be a man who looks really, really like him with a model of the White House in the background’.
The man in the tape resembles Bush but seems slightly smaller and less constipated. He also waved mysteriously although it was unclear who he may have been waving at. Some officials have speculated that it may be one of Mr Bush’s many nuclear weapons scientist or more likely one of Mr. Bush’s ‘imaginary friends’.
The footage was shot from a distance and alternated between zooming in on Bush and panning across men said to be Secret Service agents. If authentic, the footage would mean that Bush was still in the White House last Thursday and not rolling in the billions of dollars that he has awarded his friends in reconstruction contracts for Iraq, saying ‘suckers‘.